How do we know what’s right for us NOW in midlife?
A Seven Step Prescription For an Experimental Mindset in Midlife
Now, if you’re reading this I’m assuming you’re the kind of woman who’s regularly looking for new ways to up her game—and feel fitter, happier, and more contented in your life?
But, in your never ending search for more, do you ever feel like there’s just too much out there?
And I mean ‘too much’ in the way of…
What you should be doing?
How you should be exercising?
What you should be eating? (Not to mention all the scary conditions just waiting round the corner, that make you feel like staying under the covers.)
Well, how the heck should we know what’s right for us, and take a balanced approach to staying healthy and well —
Or even get into our good place (the magic) ✨ with everything that’s going on?
Well, THAT was the exact question I was asked on a podcast recently, and it’s something I’ve been mulling over ever since.
Because although I do my damndest to pull back the curtain on midlife, and help women uncover the right path for them, even I feel bombarded by all the ‘shoulds’ and ‘shouldn’ts’ out there…
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: the key to tell what’s right for you, and uncover your truest sense of self, is to embrace an experimental mindset.
Now before you stop and say, ‘Holly, I just don’t jive to that! I want absolutes, not more things to try out!’
… Just hear me out for a second.
Because the truth is you’re going to have to embrace this if you want to figure out what really lights you up in life.
So that’s why I came up with my 7-Part Prescription for an Experimental Mindset.
(And yes, I called it ‘prescription,’ because if you’re feeling resistant—it’ll make it easier to swallow. Plus it’s exactly what the doctor ordered. So here’s what that looks like:
1. Investigate
Start by thinking about those people who are in alignment with your value base*, your personality and what lights you up. Follow them on social media, read their books, listen to their podcasts, watch their films.
Then…
2. Choose
In other words, based on your intuition and what feels right for you—pick an idea or strategy to try on for size.
Now, the beautiful truth here is we’re so much wiser now! And SO DONE with anything that no longer serves us. And yes, it’s time to get ruthless. Delete the feed from the 20 year old doing lunges, or the influencer in hotpants that makes you feel inadequate.
And instead replace them with inspirational women. Women who embody who you are, and where you want to go. Trust me, it’ll serve you in the long run…
3. Experiment
This is all about establishing your strategy. Not sure what that is? Take advice from friends, your doctor, people you respect—in other words, people who you know have your best intentions at heart.
(And if you’ve been thinking about trying that plant-based diet, or taking up pickleball? Now’s the time to do it…)
4. Listen to Subjective Feedback
The crucial thing to remember here is any new start will (probably) feel sticky at first. In fact, that’s totally understandable. Ask yourself—is it a natural fit for you? Or does it rub up against who you are, and how you approach things?
Subjective feedback means listening to your gut, and using your intuition. (Remember you’re so much wiser now!)
5. Get Objective Feedback
This is exactly as it sounds—ask others for tangible results.
So what does that look like? Well, if you were a client, this is where understanding my 7 energy levels are a HUGE advantage, and I’d ask you where you’re resonating at right now.
But if you’re not, ask someone you trust. Are you more energized? Do you seem happier, or more contented?
Finally, take a step back and objectively ask yourself how you’re doing. (This may sound counterintuitive, but don’t forget: there’s real truth in your own objective wisdom.)
6. Evaluate
Are you getting the results you desire? Are you excited, committed, eager to continue? (And have you given it enough time?!)
Which leads me to…
7. Re-evaluate
Now this step is crucial! I can’t say it enough…
Why? Because so often we don’t give something a chance to work! We disregard fasting because it’s too damn hard, we turn up the heat on our cold shower, we pack in the yoga because we’ll never be able to bend like we could in our teens…
Well, maybe not. But y’know what? Who cares! And if you’ve learned anything by now in life you know none of this is going to be a homerun. You’re not going to knock it out of the park first time…
But the important thing is you trust the process, and you’ve reached the best conclusion for you, by assessing and evaluating.
And know this: You’re already a success in showing up for yourself. You became one the moment you chose to stand up and age powerfully.
Rooting for you,
XO
Holly
P.S. I know this isn’t easy! Whatever age you are, starting something new can make you feel nervous, scared, and afraid you’ll fail. But as I like to say: ‘if not now when?!’
… And there’s no failure in trying something new.
Now, if you want to learn more about embracing an experimental mindset in midlife, there are 2 things you can do next:
- Listen to the podcast episode, that kickstarted all this. Yup, this entire prescription came out of one simple question that Maryann LoRusso asked me on the More Beautiful podcast. (It’s amazing what happens when someone inspires you, right?)
- *Take my Values Assessment. If you’re new to this journey, and not sure what your true, core values are anymore (yes, they are changing up big time now in midlife) my Values Assessment will help you figure that out.