A Secret Elixir

A Secret Elixir

by | Jun 1, 2019 | Blog

Surprising Benefits Of Finding A Hobby

Want a surefire way to improve the quality of your life, relationships, and mood? Get a hobby. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking as if it’s that simple, how could something so frivolous make that much of a difference? The last thing I need is another commitment. Hobbies are for people who lead quiet, relaxed lives, and have extra time. I get it, between the kids, work, staying on top of household responsibilities, the notion of a finding a hobby can sound like a waste of time. But actually, for those people who lead very full and busy lives, it’s all that more important to find a hobby. Think taking up a hobby is an ineffective, senseless, or self-indulgent way to use your time? Read on to discover the amazing benefits a hobby can have on your life.

Why Get A Hobby?

Relieves Stress & Lessens Negative Self-Talk- First and foremost hobbies relieve stress and clear our minds by keeping us engaged in enjoyable and positive tasks. Taking our attention away from the day-to-day challenges and issues we face.

Enhance Social Connections- Hobbies are something that you can frequently enjoy with other people. Whether you join a club, play in a league, or just come across people with similar interests and mindsets. Moreover, when you  take some time to do something enjoyable it lifts our spirits so our current relationships reap the benefits of our improved mood. 

Increase Confidence and Self Esteem- Your hobby is going to challenge you in someway, whether mentally or physically. As you overcome these challenges, your confidence will be boosted. 

Enrich Who We Are– When people ask you what you do in your free time, hobbies prevent you from standing there and scratching your head in puzzlement. Hobbies give us something to talk about, adding layers to our identity. They give us space to view ourselves differently, exposing us to new ideas and different perspectives.

Promotes Productivity- Hobbies prevent burnout allowing us to take time out for ourselves, bringing us renewed energy and excitement. This will carry over to the rest of our activities whether at work or home. And since most hobbies usually require rearranging of our schedules to fit it in the activity, it forces us to manage our time more wisely and productively.

Don’t even know what pastime would make you happy? Best bet is to start by building on your own interests. Think about what you value most, examine your skills and personality, and pay attention to what excites you. Being outdoors, doing something physical or creative with others or alone. What skills would you like to learn, talents you want to develop, or experiences you crave? Brainstorm some ideas and try out a new activity from your list. Lastly, pay attention to how you feel during the experience and give it at least three to four attempts to get over the beginners’ hurdle. You may not find the right fit for you right away, but the upside is along the way you can have a lot of fun trying new things and exploring what’s out there. This summer take some time to check out a hobby or two, with the season’s warmer temperatures and longer daylight hours, along with for most, more liberties in our schedules makes for a perfect time to take some time  enjoying an activity that is not attached to work or other commitments. 

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-

 

All Goals Are Not Created Equal

All Goals Are Not Created Equal

by | May 1, 2019 | Blog

The Art of Powerful Goal Setting

Why does it go wrong so often? Why do people set goals that they fail to bring to fruition? Or, even more interesting: Why do people continue to express a feeling of lack even after they complete or achieve goals? Well, truth be told not all goals are created equal. There is actually a skillfulness behind setting goals that go the distance. Mindlessly setting and even effectively achieving goals in and of itself will not be enough to derive the outcomes we hope to achieve when we originally set them. Rather, it is in the skillfulness of creating goals that not only have extrinsic value (i.e. fame, fortune, power, and love) but most importantly intrinsic; identifying goals that are consistent with who we are, what lights us up, and coming from a place of choice.

Bottomline, when we exert effort pursuing goals that are close to our heart, we lock in with more conviction to see them through. Thus, a greater likelihood to attain a goal as well as enjoy the journey of its pursuit and complete satisfaction of it’s attainment while securing  sustainment and quiet possibly further accomplishment. Why because these goals coordinate with our true selves, self-concordant goals infuse our life with purpose and simply said make us happier.

There are 3 basic conditions to powerful goal setting, I refer to them as the 3 A’s…

  1. Affection – goals that you are passionate about, doing things you like to do, that serve a bigger purpose. For example, getting fit and healthy not just to lose weight and inches  but to provide more energy so you can keep up with your kids or manage health risks. 
  2. Authenticity – engaging in goals that are aligned with how you see yourself, your personality, and what’s most important to you. Not Susie down the block or your mom’s take on things or for that matter the latest social media feed.
  3. Autonomy – pursuing goals out of our own personal conviction, coming from a place of choice and freedom.

But of course applying the 3 A’s isn’t that simply, thus where in resides the crux of the problem and why so many of us find ourselves on the proverbial hamster wheel of life. Setting out with the best of intentions to develop self-concordant goals won’t be enough, we need to first get clear on our true authentic self, learn or rediscover what we are passion about, and identify the aspects of our lives that currently hold the most meaning to us. A great place to start is with my complimentary workbook, Discover Your Internal Compass. I created it for this very reason, bringing together many tools and explorations I’ve used over the years to help women secure and lean into powerful goal setting…download it today for free on my website.

Wishing You Always The Very Best Of Success 

-Holly-

 

Power Up!

Power Up!

by | Apr 1, 2019 | Blog

Nurture Your Strengths

Many people are under the misconception that the sole focus of my work with clients is to attend to what’s not working well in their lives.  Though yes of course, obtaining what it is we want in and for our lives requires a level of attention to those areas that are weak or lacking, we often minimize or completely overlook our most powerful asset–our strengths. 

For some reason, when you ask most people how they can see themselves move more proactively towards a future best self, their knee-jerk reaction is to start listing all the things they want to “fix” about themselves or their circumstances. But research clearly shows that people actually experience faster growth and development when they nurture their strengths instead of correcting their shortcomings. 

Identifying and learning how to lean into our “signature” traits, those core characteristics that come most naturally to us, will be equally if not more important to reaching our goals as well as  improving our overall well-being. There has been a huge amount of research over the past 15 years finding those people who know and use their strengths on a regular basis are much more fulfilled, report a higher quality of life, and have much more fun at work. A great resource and tool that I have come to use personally and love to share with clients comes from The Via Institute. They put together a list of 24 character strengths where you can measure yourself through a simple 15-minute online assessment learning more about your strengths and how to leverage them. The assessment is free and can be easily downloaded using this public link: www.viacharacter.org. 

Of course, this is not to suggest we ignore making efforts to improve those areas we are weak in but rather, in addition, nurture and utilize our strengths to see where they may be able to support or lessen areas of weakness. It’s in both these actions where we can create the greatest likelihood for success. 

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-

Top 10 Hit List

Top 10 Hit List

by | Mar 1, 2019 | Blog

Life Changing Habits

Seventy-six newsletters later I’m thinking it’s time for a top 10 hit list of those suggestions most celebrated and proven when practiced to make a significant impact on clients lives. Though clearly what works for one person won’t work for all, this month I’m taking my 77th newsletter to highlight those insights I’ve shared over the years standing the test of time and reported to be game changers in MOST peoples lives.

Ten Habits That Will Dramatically Change Your Life For The Better

1. Live Life Authentically
Express yourself-style and your gifts-in all that you do. Operating from a place of greatest authenticity, frees us up, allowing us not to be so focused on being something or someone else we are not. Better enabling us to put our energy into more effective and productive actions that enhance the way we show up in life.

2. Surround Yourself With Positive People                                                                                                                                   Align yourself with people who inspire, motivate, and support. Positive relationships nurture and influence us to greatness simply because they allow us to be at our very best.                                                                                                                                

3. Pick Three Things to Do Each Day
Staying on top of our personal and professional lives can be overwhelming. Pick 3 things to do each day and get to those three things first, and then wherever the rest of the day takes you, you know at least you’re progressing and accomplishing what you need to.

4. Unplug From Your Phone/Computer
Unplugging from the digital world is a great way to reduce the stress that being “on” can bring into our lives. Keeping up with email, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. 24/7 is simply not good for our brains, resulting in overstimulation that takes away from our levels of productivity and presence within our relationships. Developing new protocols to lessen, “unplug” from time to time should be apart of everyone’s daily routine.

5. Maintain A Balance Approach To Life
I call it the ripple effect. When we attend to all valued aspects of our lives it makes each aspect of our lives better. When I go to the gym, have a great “date” with my husband, participate in a community event, or just read a good book all by myself, the following day I’m all that more productive and engaged at work. Then when at work and finding a great groove it empowers me to be a better coach, parent, wife, colleague, sister, friend, and daughter. It’s not so much the amount of time one commits to the varied valued aspects of their lives but more importantly that they do.

6. Cultivate a Mastery Mindset
A mastery mindset is the desire to continually develop into the best we can be. It is an approach to life that embraces constant self-expansion with the understanding that setbacks and disappoint do not define our realities but rather are the building blocks from where our greater success comes from. As it is through life’s trials and tribulations where we gain valuable knowledge about what we need to attend to in order to acquire what it is we want in and for our lives. Consider yourself, your life a work in progress. Strive for mastery, not perfection. Simply ask yourself each day what can you do to support a better version of yourself than the day before.

7. Practice Gratitude
Consider the possibility that your life is already filled with overflowing abundance and start seeking evidence to support this. Research shows that those who practice gratitude daily by taking time to notice and reflect upon the things they’re thankful for experience more positive emotions, feel more alive, sleep better, express more compassion and kindness, and even have stronger immune systems. It’s a great way to shift the focus off the negative and help drown out the cynical mindset that holds us back from experiencing greater happiness in our lives (see below for more on that).

8. Reframe Negative Self-Talk & Thoughts
Our thoughts can make or break our success and well-being. Deliberate, positive self-talk is the fastest and most effective way to replace the negative “mind chatter” that holds us back. The practice of reframing our negative self-talk into more constructive and optimistic perspectives and language enables us to better move on from situations where we may feel stuck, confused, frustrated, and or angered. Though in the beginning reframing may feel as if you’re faking it, research proves, in time this consistent interruption and change of thought patterns will generate more proactive responses and actually begin to retrain your brain to embrace positivity.

9. Take Care of Your Body
A strong body makes for a strong mind. When our bodies are functioning optimally, we have the physical energy to work, play, study, and think. In other words, we have the energy to do the things that bring us success, in however we measure that. This not only includes the obvious like sleep, nutrition, and exercise but attending to doctor/dental appts, rest & relaxation, use of supplements, drugs, and alcohol as well as stress management. The more proactive we are about taking care of our physical self, the more energy will be present where and when it needs to be in use…which is pretty much always even when we are sleeping.

10. Deprioritize Whatever Doesn’t Honor Your Goals                                                                                                                Learn to say no. If you want to achieve your goals, becoming more selective in how you allocate your time will be a must. Ask yourself how much of what you’re doing in your day promotes your objectives. Say no to anything that is not in alignment with what you want in and for your life.

So here’s my suggestion, since experts say it takes up to 21 days for a new habit to form, pick one of the above-suggested habits each month for the rest of the year (coincidentally there are 10 months left to this year) and by years end you too will experience for yourself the dramatic impact these empowering habits will have on your life.

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-

Making Big Strides With Small Steps

Making Big Strides With Small Steps

by | Feb 2, 2019 | Blog

Change is a Process…Not an Event

The advent of the new year has come and gone and understandably for many, the allure of creating positive change within our lives begins to wane. Suddenly, the drive to seek more success and fulfillment in our careers, relationships, health, and well-being begins to diminish. Of course, we still want more for ourselves, personally and professionally, it’s just that the effort is hard to sustain, life gets in the way, and results don’t typically occur quick enough, all of which detracts from the once renewed sense of energy we had back in January.  But hears the good news, that is ok because change is a process and not an event. Having the things we want in and for our lives will not happen overnight, research proves it is within the small, subtle (not sizable or drastic) tweaks we make gradually that will add up to the big changes we seek. So don’t give up on those new year resolutions yet, slow and steady actually does win the race. Read on and learn how to make big strides with 4 small steps.

Four Small Steps That Have a Big Impact

 1.   Build On Existing Habits- Add a new beneficial behavior to an existing habit. For example, change your daily walk with your dog to a jog. Use the time carpooling your kids as an opportunity to connect. Add a fruit or vegetable with every meal and snack. Combine your daily mid-afternoon coffee break with calls or brief meet-ups with your team. The point being is to ease the creation of a desired new behavior by coupling it with an existing relatable habit.

2. Create Most Optimal Surroundings– Create a greater likelihood of success with supportive surroundings. So for example, if you want to eat healthier, stock your shelves with nutritious foods, not cookies or chips. Set out your gym clothes the night before so you’re ready to go for your workout tomorrow, put your cell phone in the draw while having dinner with your family or finishing up an important work-related project. In other words, set up your environment to promote what you want. 

3. Anticipate Obstacles– Whether it’s a sudden circumstance that interferes with our well-intended plans to align with our goals (i.e illness, technology challenges, weather conditions, etc.) or the reality that we are only human and naturally our conviction will be tested. Anticipate obstacles and prepare for them with if-then strategies. So for example, if the going gets tough with work aspirations then connect with a mentor or other colleagues that can be of support or inspiration and create accountability. If you know you have a series of commitments that will challenge healthy eating or regular workouts then eat a nutritious, filling snack before heading out or travel with a jump rope should you be out of town or stuck indoors due to inclement weather. Know life can get in the way and plan accordingly.

4. Act. Learn. Build. Repeat.- The key to success is seeing change as a curious experiment and then taking a bunch of small actions steps to point yourself in the direction you want to go. Follow this formula and results are inevitable. 

Do not underestimate the power of taking small steps, not only does its cumulative effects provide tangible markers of success but the cost of failure is comparatively low.  So there’s less on the line to lose allowing us to feel more confident and at ease with implementing change into our lives. Sounds like a win-win to me!

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

by | Jan 1, 2019 | Blog

Maximize Your Success This Year

There’s no denying that with a new year comes fresh opportunities and a renewed sense of energy to attain the things we want in and for our lives. But simply setting vague, lofty goals won’t be enough. In last month’s newsletter, we were able to get a jump start on thinking through those goals we want to focus on this coming year by doing the suggested self-designed wheel exercise shared in December’s post. Now, this month it’s time to create the structure we need to actually achieve those goals. One of the best ways to manage and track our progress is with the SMART process, a well-known coaching tool used to break down goals into manageable action steps providing the clarity and direction needed for goal setting while simultaneously enhancing accountability and lessening feelings of overwhelm.

As you can see the word SMART is used as an acronym:

S – Specific What specifically do you want? Or what exactly is the first step/action you need to take?

M – Measurable What is the quality or quantity you want?

A – Achievable Is this goal possible or step/action possible?

R – Reasonable Will you do this? How reasonable is it that you will do this?

T – Time By when will you reach this goal (entire goal) or complete the first step (not the entire goal)?

Each letter in the acronym helps guide goal setting in a certain way. So for example, let’s say I want to use the SMART process for a professional goal to obtain more clients. Gaining more clients is a good starting point but is much too vague. How many new clients do I want to gain? How will I gain them? When will I gain them by? How will I measure my success? And most importantly are the action steps realistic and reasonable? These are all questions that need to be answered…

Gain more clients for my business by providing free monthly webinars. Now, this is better, but I still need a way to measure how many clients I am gaining through these free webinars. So I determine a form of measurement. Gain 3 clients every quarter for my business by providing free monthly webinars. This is a good SMART goal. Not only does it outline a specific objective, but it also defines how I will achieve that objective while giving me a timeline and several milestones to track my progress. Additionally, I know I have the materials and technology as well as time to put monthly webinars into place so it is an achievable and reasonable goal.

Here’s another example using the SMART process but this time with a personal goal to lose weight for someone let’s say who is approximately 20lbs overweight.

Lose weight by exercising a minimum of three times a week and join Weight Watchers. Again a great start as now they have clarity and direction with actions steps in place but now it’s important to manage and track progress. By exercising three times a week and following the Weight Watchers plan a minimum of 2lbs a week will be lost. This is not only achievable but reasonable as stated this person has excess body weight and it is assumed she can commit to this plan.

Maximize your chances for success this year, follow the two-step process provided in both last and this month’s post, not only will you determine those goals that will support the outcomes you are looking to see happen in 2019 but the roadmap to getting you there.

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success 

-Holly-