It’s Easier Than You Think!
You’re 52—and finally met the man of your dreams. He’s kind, generous, and with 3 sons, it’s your chance to build the family you always longed for.
You had an incredible wedding, and those two weeks in Paris were simply… *Sigh*
But, back home, when the confetti settles, and he carries you over the threshold? You’re backdown to earth with a jolt.
Because, your husband’s boys resent you.
They turn away when you speak to them…
And while you never wanted to take the place of their mother, you’re locked into the fear that they could achieve exactly what they set out to do—and drive a wedge between you and your husband.
‘Hardly the Brandy Bunch’ you think with irony.
But, the truth is, all those fears you can’t think straight, and cannot see how to resolve this.
Well, that was Monica’s story. And talking this through in one of our sessions, I knew she needed only one thing…
The ABC Gameplan.
Now, the ABC Gameplan is all based around one central premise: success no matter what.
It’s perfect if you have an all-or-nothing mentality—or in those scenarios when you find fear, uncertainty or plan old procrastination stopping you from making those decisions crucial to your well being.
>> Want to wake up each morning and go for a run?
>> Need to look for a new job, but just cannot find the time?
>> Want to find a way to heal a relationship with your spouse’s children—or anyone in your life?
You need the ABC Gameplan.
And here’s how it works…
First, break down any objective into 3 possible outcomes:
- Plan A: the ideal situation you want from any scenario.
- Plan B (or your backup plan…)
- Plan C: your safety net, or the bare minimum you need to succeed.
Here’s an example:
Jesse, my daughter, phoned at 2am with terrible stomach cramps. We talked and talked, and after we decided what she should do next, I wound up laying there, mind racing, staring at the ceiling.
Now, you may remember how much I love to work out. But that morning I had zero desire to move my body…
So, I started with the bare minimum! Pushups to see if I was in the mood. B? Lifting those weights. And before I knew it, I was on my A plan—and the Peloton with Robin Arzon.
Do you see what happened there? I gave myself grace to achieve the bare minimum—and that’s totally the point of the ABC Gameplan.
Now, it’s important to remember the ABC Gameplan is not all about hitting your A. In fact, usually you won’t because that perfectionist mindset will creep in.
But the crucial thing to remember is: progress over perfection.
Because here’s the deal…
So many women I see are completely caught up in an all-or-nothing mentality—which in itself stops them from moving forward.
Maybe you feel this too?
But, understanding that there is a natural ebb and flow to success can help reduce what I call the ‘throwing the baby out with the bathwater’ syndrome…
Or in other words, just because you feel frustrated, challenged or disappointed with your progress towards a particular goal, it doesn’t mean you should fall back into limiting beliefs—and throw in the towel.
So, what happened to Monica?
Well, more than anything she wanted to create a happy, unified family. So, she invited her stepsons over for dinner with her ABC Gameplan in mind…
And this is how that looked for her:
A: Enjoy dinner and spend time together.
But Monica knew she couldn’t control their behavior—or a bunch of other influencers might get in the way. So…
B: To say to herself: ‘Okay, if it doesn’t go well, I’m not going to take what they say so personally.’
C: (Or, in other words if the sh*t hits the fan?) To know how to respond better next time…
Now, I’d love to say Monica hit her A first time. But, in reality she couldn’t get past a wobbly C.
However, over time, the ABC Gameplan served her well. It helped her to keep her cool, and build those bridges with her stepsons. They appreciated her patience, and now, she’s slowly hitting her A…
Want to take your ABC Gameplan to the next level? Grab my 10 Question Toolkit and ignite a midlife reboot.