Instant Clarity

Instant Clarity

The Secret…Knowing Your Core Values 

Wow. Maybe it’s me, but every year it seems no sooner have we put the cap on the sunblock, we’re closing the door on the last trick or treater… 

And before we know it, our attention turns to Thanksgiving, holidays and the endless whirlwind of present buying, baking and entertaining. *Phew.

Yup. In this crazy run up to the holidays, it can be SO easy to fall prey to the needs of other people—and neglect all those areas that have the biggest impact in your life. 

Meaning? 

By the time your in-laws are round, and drinks are flowing, you can feel as burned out as that bird in the oven!

So, the question is—how can we stay sane, productive, and successful, even when our attention is pulled in a million-and-one directions? 

The secret lies in setting our values.  

Now, a Values Assessment is something I use with ALL my clients—and something I encourage them to come back to, at least annually. 

And the run up to the new coming year is the perfect time for this, because it forces us to turn our attention to ourselves, and lays the groundwork for January’s inevitable desire to set goals and start afresh. 

Why should I define my core values? What makes this so important?

Core values are the principles we choose to live by—those highly personal points of reference that emotionally affect and inspire us to take action. Here are the 3 main reasons to define your core values: 

1. Shifting Priorities

Here’s the deal. When you do get super clear on what’s MOST important to you, you’ll develop an actionable, meaningful ‘to-do’ list that aligns with your core values.

And this is particularly important in midlife. Because so much of our lives have shifted, and altered—it’s easy to realize, what once was important is really immaterial (or at least, might need some tweaking!)

For example, if you asked me five years ago what my core values were, I would’ve said ‘accomplishment’ and ‘productivity.’ But not any more… 

Truth be told, I’ve replaced accomplishments with growth. Because for me, life isn’t so much about achieving anymore, it’s about growing into a better version of myself.

Let’s look at some other examples…  

For you, knowledge might be extremely important. So setting aside time to study, for private reading, and being involved in programs will become part of your weekly schedule.

If health and wellbeing is your priority, it makes sense that you’ll eat right, exercise well, and get the sleep you need to thrive with optimum energy and vitality. 

In short, all these things allow us to help organize and prioritize our time—but first we must discover which values are right for us.

2. Making Decisions

So often in life we find ourselves torn when making decisions. We agonize over the ‘right’ course of action to take, big or small. And when you throw stress and overwhelm into the mix, finding a resolution can become convoluted, and unnecessarily painful.

Because the truth is, us women? We can do a number on ourselves! We can allow self-doubt to creep in, and don’t trust ourselves enough… 

But we do know our values. 

And when we line up our decisions with what we want to do, and how we want to show up—well, that’s when we discover what’s truly important. 

I once had a client who lived a very corporate lifestyle. To keep herself aligned, she laminated her core values, and kept them with her at all times. And when she’d go to meetings, or have difficult client calls, she’d check in with them. 

Why? It helped her clarify how she wanted to show up, and the right way for her to move forward.  

3. Kickstarting Your Why

Now, I could’ve said ‘motivation’ here… But I’ve said it before, motivation is something we cultivate, not something that just happens. 

And if you wait for it, you’ll be waiting forever! 

If we’re honest, I think a lot of us are confused. We’re living by other people’s standards, or agendas—and we never really take stock in what’s most important to us. 

But when you articulate your why, now that will REALLY light a fire under your goals and objectives…

How Do I Complete The Values Assessment

Creating a list of values is personal work, and it’s work just for you.

The first thing to know is, this isn’t a quick exercise. (And my list of values has gotten longer over the years, as clients have added to it!)

But, as you’ll see it is an important, life changing one. 

First, download and print out your Values Assessment here. 

Then, find a quiet space to work uninterrupted, and take time for the following:

  1. Take a pencil and cross off everything that doesn’t resonate with you.
  2. Circle the values that do resonate. 
  3. Take these words and create up to five subgroups. Work intuitively.
  4. You will find within each group there are words that nail it for you, that encompass that subgroup. These are your core values. 

So, How Do I Apply This To My Life?

The true benefit in the Values Assessment comes from applying it to your life, and this can be challenging. Many women come to me and just cannot see a correlation between their goals and their values… 

So that’s why, if you show me that you’ve completed the assessment, I’ll offer a free complimentary 30 minute breakdown of your results—where I tie each value down to your goals, and what you REALLY want from this next phase of life. 

Ready? I can’t wait to see what it uncovers for you!

Rooting for you,

XO 

Holly  

P.S. Missed the link above? No sweat: download your free Values Assessment here

And remember, once you’ve completed it, please contact me for a free complimentary 30 minute breakdown of your results.

 

 

Discover A Superpower

Discover A Superpower

Know Your Why

Lending further to last months post on the value of using “reminders” to cultivate a consistent commitment to those things we desire most in our lives, along with a common theme I hear from many women regarding either a petering out or a lack of “oomph” to aggressively pursue their more challenging aspirations, I want to take this month’s post to share a powerful exercise on Knowing Your Why.

Trust me when I say this, it is not you! You don’t per se lack the willpower or capability to obtain those things you want more of in your life. Truth is, reaching our goals and then sustaining them is more about putting habits into place that will support them. We all know anything worth having doesn’t happen overnight and requires extra attention and effort to attain. This is where the power of knowing and having a strong “why” comes into play.

Life is crazy distracting, filled with many curveballs, making it so easy to fall off our path to raise our game. If we don’t get super clear about the value of our pursuits, we undoubtably will run short in obtaining them. Why would we ever push threw the discomfort of a hard conversation with our partner, wake up  early to fit in a workout, or chalk up a loss of a client to a lesson learned? Knowing both the positive things we will experience when reaching for our ideal self verse the negative consequences that will result should we abandon our goals is the superpower we all need to take ourselves to the next level. 

 

  “Knowing My Why”

Reflection Exercise  

 Brief Description of Your Aspiration:

 

 List:

-Positive Things I Will Experience As A Result                      –Negative Consequences Should I Give Up                          

 _____________________________________________                        __________________________________________

 _____________________________________________                        __________________________________________

 _____________________________________________                        __________________________________________

 _____________________________________________                         _________________________________________

 _____________________________________________                         _________________________________________

Ask Yourself:

-How is my life going to change if I follow through, most immediately and in the long run?

 -Consider the impact actualizing your goal will have on every aspect of your life: health/wellbeing,   relationships, finances, personal & professional development. 

Now, get your mind right, you know the the famous expression “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” Growth is not a linear path, we zig up and we zig down. Of course it won’t be easy, be patient and compassionate with yourself as you would with a dear friend or your child. There’s no shaming nor should we let ourselves off the hook. We keep at it and always, always remember our WHY! 

P.S. On a side note, this exercise is also a great tool to determine whether or not the goals you are pursuing are truly worthwhile to you. So often we fall prey to setting goals that we think we “should” be acquiring when in actuality they aren’t really all that important to us nor do they align with who we genuinely are and what lights us up. 

 

 Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-