Why Does Midlife Get Such A Bad Rep?

Now that I am personally in the height of midlife, I find myself vacillating between feelings of uncertainty and confusion yet a budding excitement of possibility and newness.  I mean I get it, navigating the inevitable transitions we face; our children leaving home, careers changing, parents aging/dying, re-envisioning intimate/social relationships, all while adjusting to our own health and body changes can be a disruptive force. For many of us, up until this point, there seemed to be a path we followed (i.e. school, careers, marriage/partnership, caretaking), or at least it was prescribed to us as the road that lead the way. But now the map leads…where?

On top of that who we are has changed, we care about different things and our values have shifted. What once served us well is no longer working for us yet these old patterns and habits are hard to ditch, leaving us wondering despite our best of intentions why we still feel unfulfilled and frustrated moving into the next phase of our lives. It’s no wonder midlife gets such a bad rep!

While midlife transitions are certainly challenging and often times messy they don’t have to be a downward spiral into darkness and irrelevancy. Here’s what I know to be true…I am way wiser now than I was younger. By midlife we’ve all learned enough about ourselves better enabling us to reflect and re-evaluate how we want to show up in the next phase of our lives. It can actually be period of time where we give ourselves permission to wipe the slate clean and reclaim ourselves, where leveraging a life filled with highs and lows can be the door to accessing a richer and deeper adult phase of life. 

Crisis or transformation? I think that’s really up to us. Look I really don’t like the fact that I find myself trying to conceal my “turkey” neck, struggle to sleep through the night, am trying to figure out how to empty nest gracefully, and am suddenly questioning goals I thought for sure would lead my way into the latter years of my life are now feeling flat and uninspiring. But here’s the thing, change IS an inevitable part of life. There is no getting around that. And since midlife seems to usher in a constant state of transitions, I know the one and only thing I can truly control is how I chose to show up through each. No doubt it’s going to be a bumpy ride, but I’m going to lean in and trust the process, reminding myself I’m behind the steering wheel and put worry and doubt in the back seat. 

Anyone with me?

Wishing You Always The Best Of Success

-Holly-