Girl Power!

April 2013 Insights


So the other day I find myself explaining to my 10 year old daughter “why are girls so mean to other girls?”. She couldn’t get it, she was watching a movie depicting how awful girls can be to each other for no valid reason. She was right, there is no sense in it!

I can still remember the close group of friends I had when I was her age and how each week one of the five of us was the designated low man on the totem pole, the one ostracized for no apparent reason other than at least it wasn’t you being talked about. The funny thing is that no one was discounted, we each experienced the ridicule the others provided, yet sadly no one ever suggested to consider another way to express our insecurities. So we continued to mask our own fears and self-doubts by being judgmental and yes down right mean to any girl who posed a threat or pushed a button. It’s too bad, adolescence is hard enough, think of how much better it would be if we as girls came together and supported each other. Damn, we may have ruled the world and no longer be considered the minority sex after all.

Sadly, even as a grown woman, I still see this behavior amongst my peers. Yes, it’s disguised better but still just as harsh as I remember when I was a young girl. It surprises me, you would think, as we age we would be wiser and kinder to our gender. So I decided to take this months Keys To Success insights and suggest that the next time we find ourselves quick to judge a female friend, acquaintance or brief encounter to consider putting yourself in her shoes. Maybe there is a good reason she is getting under your skin, a reason that has nothing to do with her but rather you.

Now of course, this is not to say there can’t be valid reasons to be annoyed by another woman nor am I suggesting you allow women to make you feel uncomfortable. Granted, I’m all for speaking up for yourself as long as it’s done responsibly. However, it’s just not cool to be that “mean girl” anymore. Besides, don’t we have enough to do with our time other than use it to knock other women down. Remember, “blowing someone’s else’s candle out doesn’t make your flame burn any brighter”.