How Do You Want To Show Up?

 July 2015 Insights

We all are familiar with the proverbial saying, “It is not what you say but it is how you say it that counts most.” Conversations take place at all levels of energy, we either are inspired and bought in or turned off and drained by them. Though effective communication seems like an ability that comes easy to some people it is actually a learned skill, that with cultivation can be acquired by anyone. So how do we go from maybe just being an ordinary communicator to a dynamic communicator?

whats_your_messageAn important first step in effective communication is knowing who you are and how you want to show up to the world. I, myself never consider this seemingly simple yet essential ingredient to successful communication until pursuing my coaching certification at iPEC (Institute of Professional Excellence in Coaching). Among many great coaching tools that were provided, the exercise in establishing a core message was and still remains one of my favorites. Taking the time to establish your core message provides clarity and direction bringing us opportunities to expand our growth and lead us closer to achieving our goals.

In a nutshell, a core message is THE message you send out about who you are. It is a statement that represents your unique gift , value and purpose you bring into the world. Bottom line it’s all about how you want to show up everyday to everyone. Regardless of where you are and who your audience may be (i.e. family, friends, children, colleagues, romantic involvements, etc..), your core message creates the foundation to every word, sentence, paragraph, speech that you say. The concept behind a core message is to create a “ideal” image of how you want to present yourself to others as well as yourself.

A great place to  start is to brainstorm a list of all the qualities you believe describe your ideal image of the communicator you want to be. This includes attitudes, beliefs, behaviors, and any other characteristics you can think of. Some examples might include; confident, humble, intelligent, compassionate, appreciative, genuine, articulate, “together”, optimistic, proactive, fun/humorous etc.. Then from there circle the 3 to 7 most important items listed and create a statement using an affirmative tone so rather then saying “As a dynamic communicator, I will be…” Write “As as a dynamic communicator, I am…Focus on the content, feeling, and the energy it evokes within you.

Keep this statement written on a separate piece of paper or in your notes on your phone, so you can refer to it throughout your day. Naturally, depending on whom you are communicating with; your child, a friend, co-worker or boss….words, tone and body language will differ but your core message always remains the same. That is the point,  conveying your message to embody the ideal communicator you want to be. Personally I find this tool especially helpful when feeling challenged emotionally. Whether I’m feeling annoyed with my spouse, disappointed with my children, nervous before a presentation, anxious about some unknown…reflecting on my core message helps to ground and guide me so that I can honor the ideal communicator I want to be despite  any challenges that may arise.

This month carve out some quality time for yourself, create Your Core Message….



Always Wishing You The Best Of Success